The Last Days

The joy of hope and cooperation is tempered by my sadness. It is nearing my last hours here and once again I have mixed emotions. One never feels as though they have accomplished enough in the bottomless pit of poverty. I was buying a skirt and shoes yesterday at a local store and the guilt was tremendous. I know that buying things helps the store owners whose clothes hang from the ceiling rafters month in and month out. But it reminds me of the have and have not situation we live. It forces me to reconcile my own desire for success and convenience against my desire to help a group of people I love achieve a better life. I know that every penny I spend not just here but when I get back home, could buy more food and medicine. How can I accept that?

For now I must look back at this month one success at a time, some great and some small but with each taking us a step further than we were before. They officially have electronic medical records……there is a mirror in the girls dorm which we hope will improve hygiene….the local physicians have hope for a better way…..there is a village deep in the mountains whose children are protected for a few more months from consumption by parasites…..families have been reunited after months of separation…..a little girl will live to see her first birthday against incredible odds…..another will walk…..and as for Anothony he will continue to smile………